Maybe childhood is just destined to be a rapidly changing, mixed bag of emotions. At the time, I thought I was the only one who had trouble with school yard bullies, who feared the sight of the School Bus, and those awkward few seconds straining to recognize a friendly face signaling "it's OK to sit here with me." I tried to reason just what it was that caused them to focus on me. I had a big set of ears, I'll give em that one. It looked like I had been born just a set of ears and I somehow grew around them! Thank goodness Satellite Dishes hadn't been invented yet, they had enough good taunts as it was....but it wasn't ears and it wasn't just me. At first I thought it was because I was poor, maybe because my clothes while always clean and pressed were old and worn from generations of being handed down. It was only very late in life that I found out school yard bullies for the most part did not discriminate. Not until one of my earliest FB Friends and i actually exchanged a few messages did I realize...The same ones who made my life miserable made the lives of others miserable as well.....and it ran across all economic spectrum's. The poor, middle class, even the rich were not immune. We all it seems faced the same growing pains, alcohol and the abundant tribulations that come with it also influenced the lives of more people than anyone would care to admit. Nothing bad mind you, at least not at my house.....but I would sit at the window and wait sometimes....worried that maybe Daddy had been in a wreck because he was so late coming home. Very few people or places had phones back then so there was no way to know what was going on. Grandma always told me "He's just up at Claude Daniels drinking a beer, he'll be here shortly"....and she was always right on both accounts. I was always a little afraid around people who had been drinking, even family....they just didn't act the same...and it scared me. I told Grandma I would never drink....I had seen too much of what it did to folks....then I became a teenager and I did what teenagers do....few times in my life have I ever felt the shame I felt when Grandma said "I thought you said you would never drink"...